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I think I’m about to cross a boundary. Willingly.
You’ve realized you’re falling in love with your best friend. And understandably, you’re panicked?
Love is a wonderful feeling. But when it comes to your romantic love and your BFF, it’s scary because it could possibly destroy one of the most important things in the world to you.
If you have recently discovered such feelings, try to take a deep breath. And think carefully before you proceed. Here are a few things to consider before you broach the subject with your best friend:
1. He may feel the same way.
The best possible outcome here is that your best friend feels the same way about you, and you can start your passionate happily-ever-after right away. If this is the case, congratulations and good for you!
Keep in mind, though, that if you’re just infatuated with your friend or looking for a little fun, it isn’t fair to share a bunch of feelings that will only lead to him being hurt. Make sure you’re really in love before doing anything about it.
2. He may not feel the same way.
Unfortunately, being in love with your best friend does not guarantee that he will feel the same way. There’s a good chance that you guys are friends because friendly is all he feels toward you.
While this might sting, it’s important to contemplate this from the outset. How do you feel about this possibility? Can you still be friends if he doesn’t want anything more? Will you be OK not telling him how you feel if you know he isn’t interested?
Sometimes even knowing someone doesn’t return your feelings isn’t enough to quell them. You may need to take some space from the relationship for a while to sort things out … which might require telling him how you feel.
After, with proper boundaries, it’s possible you can go back to the way things were. But …
3. Your relationship may never be the same.
Whether or not he returns your feelings, there is, of course, a chance your relationship will never go back to the way it was before. Especially if you tell him you love him, hoping he’ll return the feelings, only to find out you were wrong.
If he’s a cool guy, he’ll help you both move past it with a good attitude and his inherently sweet personality, which is probably what made him such a good friend in the first place.
But there’s always the possibility that telling him how you feel will result in a friendship that’s changed for life.